I have a better understanding now of love
          but not of loss.
I have children & a wife, happy & healthy,
          none of whom has suffered
anything uncommon to middle class bubbles.
          No cars have been mangled,
the seats & buckles haven't failed, and AAA arrives
          in the rare moments we need help.
Teachers love my children & share good news.
          No detentions or reports burden us.

It has often been this way, this flow of joys
          interrupted with the rare heartbreak.
Music & books, clouds & birdsong sustained me
          while my wife worked hard into the night,
Friends & concerts, nights laughing in parks 
          while my parents struggled & sacrificed for me.
Grad school prolonged an untested belief in beauty
          when others suffered & lost (& even died).

          Perhaps now I'm fueling a reserve
of good will, good health, & good fortune
          to draw upon in some hospital years from now.
Experts, harried, will explain the diagnosis,
          my family will adjust their schedules,
will delay long-hoped-for plans, will lose sleep,
          caring for the frail me I can only imagine.
May I have the strength to find the joy then
          that I take for granted now. May my family
feel that the end of a good life need not be a loss at all. 




This was originally just the first & the last stanzas. Adding the middle one made it a kind of sonnet, in my mind.